How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize