I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
