I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
