Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man

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  (206): i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man http://tfl.nu/40et
  Replies (15) Good night (1410) Bad night (857)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.

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  (970): she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society. http://tfl.nu/p2lg
  Replies (74) Good night (757) Bad night (2668)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..

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  (610): question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused.. http://tfl.nu/1zv2
  Replies (42) Good night (681) Bad night (4434)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game

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  (618): the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game http://tfl.nu/je2o
  Replies (14) Good night (4142) Bad night (471)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.

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  (404): A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show. http://tfl.nu/h6zp
  Replies (16) Good night (7667) Bad night (881)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.

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  (208): Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly. http://tfl.nu/sulv
  Replies (20) Good night (6267) Bad night (901)
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  (626): View more from California

  Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?

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  (626): Did they have a limo or was i just stoned? http://tfl.nu/ui6f
  Replies (4) Good night (2029) Bad night (948)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water

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  (604): every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water http://tfl.nu/5vey
  Replies (8) Good night (3230) Bad night (798)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.

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  (301): Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/mimi
  Replies (21) Good night (2470) Bad night (1173)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.

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  (903): Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning. http://tfl.nu/i0lg
  Replies (6) Good night (2957) Bad night (940)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?

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  (251): When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail? http://tfl.nu/evev
  Replies (7) Good night (2775) Bad night (763)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes

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  (609): The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes http://tfl.nu/oauk
  Replies (3) Good night (857) Bad night (439)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?

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  (607): Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised? http://tfl.nu/o7ko
  Replies (4) Good night (757) Bad night (376)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up 

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  (865): I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up  http://tfl.nu/ojbn
  Replies (3) Good night (769) Bad night (423)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  cocks speak louder than words, as they say

  (914): View more from New York

  Nobody says that.

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  (207): cocks speak louder than words, as they say (914): Nobody says that. http://tfl.nu/ymrk
  Replies (8) Good night (1717) Bad night (445)

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