I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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