I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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