Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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