I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
