his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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