We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
