is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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