Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
