I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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