yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
