You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
no, he came in my armpit
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
