So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
