i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
