Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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