been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
