I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
