Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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