Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize