Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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