This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
