North Korea, Best Korea!
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
