Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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