he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
