Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
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I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
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There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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