Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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