i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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