Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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