..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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