We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i came on her dog
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
