So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
