apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize