One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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