I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
she smelled like a LAN party
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
