its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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