oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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