She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I have post one night stand depression
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