Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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