The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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