Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
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We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
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I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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