I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
why is half of my head shaved?
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