oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize