So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
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You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
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And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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