Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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