i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
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He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
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I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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