it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
