I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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