She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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